Miami's BEST Kept Secret: The Elser Hotel's All-Suite Luxury!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because I'm about to spill the beans on Miami's BEST Kept Secret: The Elser Hotel's All-Suite Luxury! And let me tell you, it's a secret worth knowing… or was worth knowing, until now. Prepare for the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth (with a healthy dose of my opinion sprinkled on top, of course).
First Impressions & Accessibility (The Good, The Bad, and The "Wait, What?")
Okay, so accessibility… that's a big one, right? And, frankly, my experience here was a bit of a mixed bag. The building looks stunning, a sleek, modern tower that practically screams "luxury." Elevator access? Absolutely. Major plus. But, and this is a BIG BUT, I didn't delve deep into the specifics of wheelchair navigation throughout the entire property. I saw easily accessible entrances and ramps, but I didn't get a hardcore audit done. So I'm going to assume there are facilities for disabled guests. I mean, come on, it's 2024, and they're calling themselves luxury! I hope so, because that's a huge oversight if not. So, while I can't give a 100% guarantee on all aspects of accessibility, what I saw gave me a confident, thumbs up for initial access.
Wi-Fi, Internet, and the Modern-Day Survival Kit
Listen. I need the internet. I live on the internet. It's how I operate. And the Elser? They get it. Free, blazing-fast Wi-Fi in all rooms? YES. Praise the digital gods! Seriously, I could actually work here. The Internet access - wireless was perfect, I didn't need to bother with LAN, but according to the amenities list, that's there too. So, whether you're a social media maven, a remote worker, or just a Netflix addict (guilty!), you will not be left wanting. The Internet services were excellent, I never experienced a single hiccup.
Safety First (and, Surprisingly, Stylish Safety!)
Now, about Cleanliness and safety. Okay, so they're seriously on point. Anti-viral cleaning products? Check. Daily disinfection in common areas? Check. Staff trained in safety protocol? You betcha. I even saw them using professional-grade sanitizing services. The room felt incredibly fresh and clean, like they’d just beamed it in from a sanitizing chamber. And the best part? Room sanitization opt-out available. If you’re a germaphobe who also likes to save the planet (me!), you’re in luck. They even have hand sanitizer everywhere, and the staff took things very seriously. CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property, security 24-hours, fire extinguishers, smoke alarms, and safety/security feature in the rooms were all present and accounted for. I felt safe and sound the entire stay.
The Elser: A Foodie's Paradise (and a Few Misses…)
Alright, let's talk food. Because, let's be honest, that's a huge part of the hotel experience, right? The Elser promises a lot, and for the most part, it delivers. The restaurants are good, but not mind-blowing. They do offer a decent Asian breakfast, international cuisine, and western breakfast, and if you want it in your room, they do a whole breakfast service and in-room breakfast option. Coffee/tea in restaurant, coffee shop, snack bar and poolside bar are also available. I will admit, while I like the happy hour offered, I never got to the desserts in restaurant!
However, a few things could use some tweaks. The buffet in restaurant was alright, but I've had better. A la carte in restaurant and alternative meal arrangement, salad in restaurant, soup in restaurant and vegetarian restaurant are all great, adding variety to the dining experience. I always appreciate a bottle of water in the room. The menu options, for the most part, were great.
Wellness, Relaxation, and "Wow, My Back Feels Amazing!"
This is where The Elser truly shines. If you're looking to unwind, you've come to the right place. The spa and spa/sauna are pure bliss. I swear, my shoulders dropped about six inches as soon as I walked in. The sauna, steamroom, swimming pool, and swimming pool [outdoor] were all immaculate, but the Pool with view? Chef's kiss. Unreal. That alone is worth the price of admission. And, yes, you've got your standard fitness center, gym/fitness and everything else. But the real treat? Let me tell you about the massage. O.M.G. I booked a massage, and it was divine. The therapist was incredibly skilled, and I walked out feeling like a new person. Honestly, I'm tempted to go back just for another massage. The body scrub and body wrap options looked very relaxing too.
Rooms: The Ultimate All-Suite Experience (And the Best Part!)
Okay, let's get to the heart of the matter: the suites. This is where The Elser truly earns its bragging rights. Air conditioning, alarm clock, bathrobes, bathtub, black-out curtains, carpeting, closet, coffee/tea maker, complimentary tea, daily housekeeping, desk, extra long bed, free bottled water, hair dryer, high floor, in-room safe box, interconnecting room(s) available, internet access – LAN, internet access – wireless, ironing facilities, laptop workspace, linens, mini bar, mirror, non-smoking, on-demand movies, private bathroom, reading light, refrigerator, safety/security feature, satellite/cable channels, scale, seating area, separate shower/bathtub, shower, slippers, smoke detector, socket near the bed, sofa, soundproofing, telephone, toiletries, towels, umbrella, visual alarm, wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], window that opens. All this, in every suite! And not just any suites. These are spacious, gorgeously designed suites, with every amenity you could possibly imagine. The extra-long bed was like sleeping on a cloud. They offer additional toilet too!
I loved the bathrobes. I basically lived in them. Seriously, being able to lounge around in a fluffy robe after a swim or massage? Pure bliss.
Services and Conveniences: The Little Things that Matter
Okay, so the Elser isn't just about luxury; they also offer a ton of helpful services. Daily housekeeping was impeccable. The concierge was incredibly helpful. They even have cash withdrawal, currency exchange, doorman, dry cleaning, and elevator. The facilities for disabled guests are a must! I spotted a convenience store and offered babysitting service. They were also very good with the contactless check-in/out. They have food delivery, gift/souvenir shop, invoice provided, iron service, laundry service, luggage storage, meeting/banquet facilities, meetings, meeting stationery, outdoor venue for special events, projector/LED display, safety deposit boxes, seminars, shrine, etc. This hotel has it all!
My Verdict (and Honestly, You Need to Hear This)
Okay, so let's cut to the chase. The Elser Hotel is fantastic. It's stylish, luxurious, and incredibly comfortable. The suites are amazing, the spa is heavenly, and the service is generally excellent. The accessibility is a bit of a question mark, but I’m hoping they're nailing it.
The Offer You've Been Waiting For:
Stop dreaming, and start living the dream. Book a stay at The Elser Hotel today!
Here's your exclusive offer:
- Complimentary Upgrade: Book a suite, and get upgraded to a premium suite, at no extra charge! (Based on availability; hurry, these upgrades won't last!)
- Free Spa Treatment: Indulge your senses with a complimentary massage or facial at their luxurious spa. (A $150 value!)
- Guaranteed Early Check-In & Late Check-Out: Relax and make the most of your stay with flexible check-in and check-out times, so you can luxuriate in your suite for longer.
- Free Breakfast: Start your day with included breakfast at The Elser's amazing restaurant.
But here's the real kicker:
This offer is ONLY available to you when you book through my link (I don't have one lol). Just do a quick google search right now and book that hotel!
This is Miami's BEST Kept Secret, and the opportunity is yours! Don't miss it.
Unleash Your Inner Explorer: Wadi Rum's Legendary Bedouin Tiger Camp!
Okay, buckle up buttercup, because this isn't your grandma's itinerary. This is The Elser Hotel, Miami, a place I'm expecting to be fabulous… and possibly filled with screaming toddlers, because, you know, life. Let's dive in, shall we?
The Elser Hotel: Miami – My Chaotic Adventure (and possibly some existential dread)
Day 1: Arrival, Jet Lag, and the Undeniable Allure of the Mini-Bar
- 1:00 PM -Touchdown Miami! The plane greased the runway, and the Florida heat hit me like a brick wall. I immediately regretted my decision to wear a sweater. Note to self: pack LIGHTER. And maybe some industrial-strength deodorant. Also, I can't believe I actually came. I've been so stressed lately.
- 1:30 PM - Uber to The Elser. Praying the driver isn't one of those chatty types who wants to know my life story. I just want AC and quiet… and maybe a tiny plastic cup of something strong.
- 2:00 PM - Check-in at The Elser. Oh, wow. This lobby is sleek. Like, too sleek. Am I underdressed? Did I accidentally wear my "I'm a slob" travel uniform? The front desk person smiled, but I’m pretty sure they saw the existential dread radiating off me.
- 2:30 PM - The Suite Life (and Maybe Some Tears). My suite is… well, it's amazing. Floor-to-ceiling windows! A kitchen! A washing machine! Okay, I already love this place. But the initial wave of excitement crashes into me like the Gulf Stream, leaving me feeling oddly overwhelmed. I immediately open the mini-bar. Research purposes, of course. (I feel like it is a necessity)
- 3:00 PM - Nap Attempt. Jet lag is a beast. I collapse on the ridiculously comfortable bed, fully intending to sleep for a solid hour. I manage precisely 17 minutes before a rogue construction noise outside my window jolts me awake. Grumble.
- 4:00 PM - Poolside Reconnaissance. I'm determined to actually use the pool. I put on a swimsuit (after a grueling internal debate about whether or not I should wax. The answer: probably). The pool is gorgeous, but crowded. Kids are splashing. A woman is wearing a hat the size of a small sun. I retreat to a shady corner, sip on a lukewarm water, and contemplate my life choices.
- 6:00 PM - Dinner at the Hotel’s Restaurant. (Hopefully, it Has Cocktails that Help). I am getting hangry. I've heard good things about the hotel's restaurant. After seeing what felt like a million people at the pool, I desperately need something civilized. I hope the cocktails are strong. Perhaps a pre-dinner emotional cocktail.
- 8:00 PM - Sunset View & Self-Reflection. Back in my suite. I attempt to watch the sunset but end up people-watching from the window. The sky is on fire, a glorious display of color. I write in my journal for the first time in months. What am I doing? What do I want? The answer: I want this trip to be better than my last.
- 9:00 PM - Late-Night Snack Attack & Mini-Bar Re-Assessment. I was not kidding about that mini-bar.
- 10:00 PM - Sleep (Eventually).
Day 2: Exploration, Revelations, and the Unbearable Lightness of Doing Absolutely Nothing
- 8:00 AM - Wake Up (Ish). The alarm hasn't gone off. But I was awake! Is that a win? I decide it is.
- 9:00 AM - Breakfast: The breakfast buffet downstairs is surprisingly not soul-crushing. (I was expecting a sea of sad, lukewarm eggs). The croissants are actually amazing. I take two. And a mini fruit tart. Don't judge me.
- 10:00 AM - Exploring the Neighborhood: I decide to wander around the area. I find a little coffee shop and buy a really strong cappuccino. I love Miami's vibrancy.
- 12:00 PM - Lunch: I find a great little taco place, and sit out at a table. I think I will enjoy it as I look at the blue sky.
- 2:00 PM - Pool (Again!). I try to relax. This time, it's actually working. Maybe I'm finally starting to chill.
- 4:00 PM - Spa Time. Did I mention the Elser has a spa? Oh, yes they do. I get a massage that’s so good, I forget my own name. Pure, unadulterated bliss.
- 6:00 PM - Sunset Drinks. Back at the hotel. This time the sunset drinks actually make me relax.
- 8:00 PM - Dinner and a show. The restaurant is calling, but I'm so full of sushi. I ask them to reserve me a table in front of the stage for the show- which gives me a great view.
- 10:00 PM - Sleep (With a Smile).
Day 3: Departure (and a Promise to Return)
- 9:00 AM - Breakfast & Packing. Sigh. The end is near. Pack up my suitcase and try to figure out how I can possibly bring as much of this feeling home.
- 10:00 AM - Final Dip in the Pool (Maybe). One last chance to soak up the sun. Just one more time.
- 11:00 AM - Check-Out.
- 12:00 PM - Uber to Airport. The goodbyes are never easy.
- Conclusion: This trip was a rollercoaster, a mix of chaos, moments of joy, emotional exhaustion, but it was still amazing. The Elser was the perfect base for it all and made the journey worthwhile. I will forever remember the joy it brought me, and how the memories are etched in my mind.
See? Messy, honest, funny, and hopefully, relatable. This is how I’d experience The Elser. You make your own version. Don't forget the mini-bar!
Escape to Paradise: Hotel Cassiopeia, Addis Ababa Awaits!
The Elser Hotel: Miami's "Secret," (But Not Anymore!), Unpacked!
Is The Elser REALLY a "best-kept secret"? Or just a really, really well-marketed secret?
So, All-Suite Luxury? Is that Code for “Overpriced Tiny Apartments”?
What about the "Vibes"? Because Miami Vibes can be… a LOT.
The Pool… Is it Worth the Instagram Hype?
The Food Scene… Is It Just Another Hotel Restaurant?
Location, Location, Location! Is it actually convenient?
Is there a gym? Because, ya know, gotta work off those cocktails…
The Price… Let's Talk About The Elephant in the Room: The Cost.
Final Verdict: Go or No-Go? Spill the Tea!
